Well pundits - last night League Blog dreamt about league and this morning it woke in a pool of drool. So we think it's about time we take the boots out of the locker, clean off last season's dried up mud, and start practising our wrestling techniques.
LB predicts an exciting year! The tea leaves are too wet to go into specifics, although it is safe to gamble responsibly on the following:
- The team formerly known as the Winless Rabbits will now just be known as the Wingless Rabbits.
- Jesus Hayne will do a cruciate in the first two weeks.
- The Bulldogs will rediscover their strength as a family team (Mortimers and Hughes's'es excepted).
- The Storm will find pain through the loss of Dallas Johnson.
- Wayne Bennett will at last give the selectors his blessing to unleash Jamie Soward onto Origin.
- Manly will be mad as hell, as will Billy Slater for no longer having Matt Orford between him and shortest man in league status.
- Matt Elliot will be lauded as a supercoach some time between rounds 1 and 5.
- Tim Sheens will be reunited with his long lost brothers Charlie and Emilio.
- As per the decadal Trans-Tasman Oscillation, the Warriors are due for a good year.
- Braith Anasta and Anthony Minichiello will reach an all-time high in core strength.
- The Titans will bring out five more fastest men in league on the wings, only for Chris Walker to make a surprise appearance in the semis.
- The Sharks will surprise quite a few people, chiefly by showing up to games.
- Everyone will forget to talk about the Raiders.
- The Knights will be fired up as hell for round one. Hopefully the Doggies put the cleaners through them and steer them on course for Rugby League's first winless season in history.
- After bumping into Tonie Carroll outside a hospice, Alan Cann will suit up the boots again to shore up the Broncos' wafer-thin frontline.
- Jonathan Thurston will finally get some recognition as one of the top players in league.
League Blog has also been asked by some mysterious female followers to give them some hints for tipping this year. As we will do anything to get women to read our blog (semi-naked pictures of Craig Wing, anyone?), we will be happy to comply. And, mysterious ladies, you may take comfort in the fact that League Blog comprised the majority of the great Felafel Farfalle team who won last year's Team Prize in the Tim Ward Rugby League Tipping comp.
So this week, League Blog would go with the favourites, although I worry about the Tigers as I think they still haven't recovered (except for a blip in 2005) from Baa Baa's hit on Ellery Hanley in the 1988 Grand Final.
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Ah yes the footy is upon us at last, and the GFC, in combination with an oversupply of mediocre cricket, should ensure interest is at an all-time high.
ReplyDeleteI detect that some of your predictions are a bit Raiders captain in cheek. Others simply over-optimistic (eg: re Hayne). Overall though I am very impressed by how well you have captured all the excitement, hope, and anticipation of a fresh season. I can actually taste it, as surely as if I had a chunky piece of sweaty football on my Raiders captain. This season definitely tastes a bit salty, but I reckon it will be sweet in the end.
Your first round tips for the mysterious ladies are themselves a little mysterious - who are the favourites? Are the Tigers really favourites to beat Manly? I predict a Lote disappointed Tiger fans after that match, with Manly fans Wolfing down the spoils of victory.
Another very even comp awaits us, with the only certainty being that in a few short days we will have new competition leaders, as well as a team running last. I hope the Raiders top the table after Round 1. Their captain deserves to savour that tasty morsel of mini-triumph, and it may be their only chance to lead all year.
(PS I think the Roosters once went an entire season without winning a game, but that was long before NRL days.)